When I was eighteen I got married. When I was nineteen we separated and I filed for divorce. When I was twenty one my divorce finalised. When I was twenty two I got married again. I'm now twenty three and happily married.
I will illustrate the reasons why my first marriage didn't work and why my current marriage does work in the form of two lists.
Coincidentally, Darren at Problogger is running a group writing project about lists. This happens to be my entry.
Reasons I got married the first time
- To prove to him that I was committed
- To make him commit to me
- To spite the world, who thought it wouldn't work
- To try and convince myself it would work
- To give us a fresh start
- To remove my fear of him leaving
- To cheer me up
- To make us a proper family
- Because we thought we should
- Because I didn't like my surname!
Reasons I got married this time
- Because we love each other
- To celebrate our relationship
- To create nice memories
- To share a lovely day with our family and friends
- To show the world how happy we are
- Because we had already committed
- Because we want to be together forever
I think that makes it pretty obvious why my first marriage failed and my current one is happy. I didn't even like my ex husband. We were trying to create something that we didn't have. No piece of paper and fancy ceremony can give you something that isn't there.
I'm really glad me and James got married. We did it for the right reasons. We already had a committed relationship. We didn't need a piece of paper to prove it, but we wanted the fancy ceremony and the celebrations.
Marriage should be an extra, the cherry on top of the icing on the cake. You wouldn't try to build a cake on top of a cherry, and you shouldn't get married until you have the cake with the icing on top already.
Remember to keep smiling :)
This entry was posted 2 years ago
It has been tagged: divorce, marriage, family, love, memories, husband, celebrations.